The Fear Within Page 21

  “Shall we go play on the swings for a few minutes?” Natasha asked.

  Mark snorted and smiled back at her.

  “So let me get this right,” he said. “Two young, attractive, nubile people—”

  Natasha tipped her head and punched his arm again.

  “Okay, one attractive person and one total hottie are out walking down a quiet street and think they’re being followed.”

  “We don’t really, we’re just spooked. It’s been a strange night,” said Natasha.

  He raised a hand.

  “They think they’re being followed,” he repeated. “So instead of sticking to the lit pathway, they head off the road and onto the dark moor, where God only knows what will happen…”

  He grabbed at her suddenly, barking like a dog and making her squeal as she recoiled from him.

  They were laughing, Natasha recovering her breath.

  Her phone beeped, but she ignored it.

  “Idiot,” she said, not really angry. “And there’s no one there, but you’re right, let’s go back.”

  He took her hand and pulled her toward him.

  Her stomach tingled in a way it never had before as he held her.

  She didn’t fight to make him let go.

  “We can go to the park for a while if you want to,” he said. “We can do pretty much anything you want to do.”

  They walked across the grass hand in hand until they came across a wooden bench and Mark sat down. He had his back to the street that they’d left behind and so Natasha, not wanting to turn her back on the light, walked just a few paces farther, to the low metal railing that ran around the outside of the children’s play equipment. She leaned back against it, looking at Mark as he sat on the bench, his arms spread out along the back, his legs wide apart.

  Behind him, even though the light was dim, she could see everything along the street, apart from a corner of it that was obscured by the line of trees. Standing in darkness, and with the light in front of her, she knew that anyone approaching would be silhouetted for her to see.

  “Why are you so nice to me?” she asked.

  He looked taken aback by the question.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, why are you so nice to me all the time?”

  “I’m nice to everyone.”

  “No, you aren’t, not like you are to me.”

  He paused at that, really looking at her.

  “Because I really like you,” he finally said. “And even if you are with someone else and I can’t have you in the way I’d really like to, I’ll take what I can get and be your friend, because I love spending time with you.”

  “Why?”

  “You’re smart, funny, fit, motivated…” He paused. “And you’re the hottest girl I’ve ever met.”

  She watched him carefully, looking for any sign of a smile or a signal that would let her know he was lying to her, teasing her; there didn’t seem to be any.

  She looked back out at the road, squinting, not sure if the edge of the tree line had changed slightly.

  “How would you like to have me?” she asked.

  “I’d like you to be all mine,” he said, without hesitation. “I’d like every bit of you to be mine and mine alone.”

  She looked at him again.

  He was handsome even with his face roughed up, she’d always thought it. He was funny, too.

  “But would you be all mine, though?” she asked.

  She walked toward him, dropping her shoes onto the grass and moving closer so she could look him in the eye. “Because I wouldn’t be willing to share.”

  He leaned back away from her, seeming unsure what she was doing, but his legs moved closer together and she knelt on the bench, straddling him. His head was back, looking up at her, and their faces were close.

  “Yes, I’d be all yours.”

  “You sure?” she asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Absolutely certain?”

  “Absolutely certain,” he said.

  “What if I said you could have me tonight?” she whispered. “What if I wanted you?”

  He swallowed and looked into her eyes.

  “I’d say no,” he said, his voice quiet.

  Natasha raised both eyebrows, pulling her head back. Her hands, which had been running across his chest, stopped and balled into fists.

  “Really?” she asked.

  “Really,” he said.

  “I’m a little bit confused by that,” she said, not moving away, but sinking down a little, relaxing her weight onto him.

  “Look, Tash. I really like you. If I’m going to sleep with you, then I don’t want it to be on some dirty park bench and when you’re a bit tipsy. I don’t know if you really want me or not; I don’t want to be tomorrow morning’s regret. If you’re saying I can be with you like that, then let’s take some leave together, find somewhere nice and quiet, and do it right, go for some food, talk for a while, then go back to a comfortable bed with clean sheets and no chewing gum stuck to it. Let’s do it so we might even want to remember it.”

  She watched him again, her heart racing.

  “I think I want it now, though,” she said, and leaned forward to kiss him.

  “And what about Jason?” Mark asked, kissing her gently and pulling away. “You told me that you’d made him wait and you’ve been together for years. What about him, and what about waiting?”

  “You and Jason are worlds apart. He’s never made my stomach flutter like you do, I didn’t even know that ever happened. Maybe I wasn’t waiting for Jason, maybe I was waiting for the right person…”

  She leaned in and kissed him again, then looked up as their faces pulled apart, sure that she’d seen something move in the trees, but she didn’t stop, didn’t care, leaned back in and kissed him again. She was going to start being with Mark, she wanted to be with him, loved how he made her feel. It would also send a clear message to everyone to leave her alone, that she wasn’t a little girl.

  He was a great guy. He liked her, understood her, put himself out for her, stood up for her, and she liked him an awful lot.

  It wasn’t how she’d imagined her first time would be, she thought, as she felt him undoing his jeans, but she felt good about him, felt good when she was with him and near him.

  He pulled her close as her breathing quickened.

  She watched the shadows of the treeline over his shoulder, watched the way it moved and then didn’t. Part of it, the shadow on the end, was out of time with the wind, moving more slowly, and without the natural rhythm of the trees. She watched for as long as she could bear, trying to make out if there was a human shape there, before she lowered her head to Mark’s mouth again.

  29

  Tuesday, February 3

  Black and Cox were deep in conversation when Dan arrived at the stores office. They were leaning in to each other, Black listening intently to what he was being told.

  Cox, in her role as the deputy logistics officer, also fulfilled the role of legal adviser, and this immediately came to Dan’s mind as she saw the two consulting. Cox was also Black’s divisional officer, and as such he was well within his rights to have her present while he was spoken to.

  “Quick word, please?” said Dan, watching as Cox immediately came out.

  She was smiling and greeted Dan cheerfully.

  “I thought you and I could have a quick chat before I speak with Petty Officer Black,” said Dan. “You okay with that?”

  Cox nodded. “Sure.”

  “What were you guys talking about?” asked Dan.

  Cox tipped her head as she looked at Dan. She seemed like a different woman from the one Dan had seen only half an hour ago, happier, more self-assured. She almost rebuked Dan with her eyes for asking.

  “I’m his divisional officer and the ship’s legal adviser,” she said. “He’s concerned and he wants me to sit in there while you speak to him.”

  “Concerned? Why?” asked Dan.

  �
��Because he knows that I’ll have been required to disclose to you the complaint allegations that Natasha Moore made against him, which of course I have, and because he knows that you’ll have found out that he was accused of some indiscretions on his previous ship. He thinks he’s going to be held accountable for something he didn’t do.”

  Dan couldn’t help but watch Sarah as she spoke, animated and friendly, confident and forceful, not the woman who’d wept at their last encounter just minutes before.

  “He won’t get into trouble for anything he hasn’t done,” said Dan, “but that’s what interests me. If you know that he’s previously been accused of this type of thing, then when Natasha came forward, why wouldn’t you have taken it more seriously?”

  Sarah Cox looked surprised.

  “Oh, I took it seriously. I spoke with Black and really thought I’d resolved the issue. Moore knew that I’d spoken to him, and that she should come back to me if there were any other problems; she never did. In fact, when we did talk again, it seemed that things had improved between them. That was certainly the firm impression I had.”

  “What did you say to Black just now?”

  Sarah Cox’s expression turned serious.

  “I explained to him that given the previous allegations against him, if another formal complaint were made, then it would likely be the end of his career in the Armed Forces and very probably could lead to a stint in Colchester, or worse.”

  “And how did he react?” asked Dan.

  “He was horrified, and I genuinely believe he hadn’t realized how his behavior had been viewed.”

  “You should know that I intend to search Petty Officer Black’s office, cabinets, and all of the storerooms where he holds access. I’d like to think I’ll be able to do that now, without delay, or I can have a sentry come down and stand guard until I get permission from your commanding officer.”

  “Yes, I suspected you might, and of course that’s fine.”

  “Okay.” Dan rocked up onto her toes. “Let’s go, then.”

  John and Black were sitting in silence when Dan and Sarah Cox walked into the office.

  The four of them made the space feel smaller than she’d have liked.

  She moved to the side, allowing Cox to pass her and take the seat next to Black, while Dan sat down in a chair slightly in front of John.

  “Petty Officer Black, I’m not going to beat around the bush. I’ve been made aware of some very serious allegations made against you by SA Natasha Moore. I’m awaiting details, but I believe they may be broadly similar to some allegations that have previously been made against you, on board your last ship. So, in light of this, I want you to be very truthful with me from the get-go, so we can get this sorted out as soon as possible. Do you understand?”

  He looked terrified, fidgeting in his chair, his right leg bouncing continually, his tongue wetting his lips every few seconds.

  “I haven’t done anything. I promise.”

  “Okay, so tell me about your relationship with SA Moore.”

  “We weren’t in a relationship, we were just friends. Nat was okay with that.”

  “Okay,” said Dan, “tell me about your friendship, then. How did it come about?”

  His mouth was already moving before Dan had finished asking the question. He was eager to speak, eager to help.

  “She joined the ship, and I was her line manager, so that’s how I met her,” he began.

  Dan felt surprised at how juvenile his language and thinking were, as if he was an enormous man-child, too simple to inhabit his adult body.

  Black seemed to be genuinely an open book, spilling out words in hopes of being understood.

  “We became friends straightaway,” Black continued. “Because we hung out down here, away from everyone else.”

  “Is that really true, Gary?” asked Dan. “Were you really friends from the start?”

  He nodded, big nods.

  “Speak up for the recorder please, Petty Officer Black,” said John.

  “Yes, Master, it really was true.”

  “Tell me how your friendship went,” said Dan. “How did it start and how did it grow?”

  “Well, she was very young and new. So I took her under my wing, to help her get settled in.”

  “Did anyone give her any trouble?”

  His face darkened, again childlike in the way his emotions were so clearly changed and broadcast.

  “Yes, she had some trouble, but I helped her.”

  “How did you do that?” asked Dan. “Can you give me an example of how you helped her?”

  Black looked at Cox, who simply nodded, as though giving him permission to speak.

  “What about LPT Coker?” suggested Dan. “I’ve heard there was some friction there. Were you able to help her with that?”

  He took in a deep breath, seeming to tense his whole body, and Dan felt John do the same beside her. Then Black exhaled.

  “LPT Coker isn’t a very nice person. He’s controlling and manipulates. When Nat came on board, he started sniffing around her. He does it with all of the young girls, but he’s bad news. He doesn’t want to be with them, to love them, only wants to have sex with them, because he can.”

  Dan nodded. “Okay, can you tell me what you think happened with LPT Coker and Natasha? Did anything physical happen between them at all?”

  “It did. I told him to leave her alone right from the beginning. I told him just to stay clear of her and let her be.”

  “Did you say you’d do anything if he didn’t?”

  He shrank back into himself, the frown back in place, then looked at Sarah Cox, who again nodded.

  “I told him he needed to leave her alone or I’d hit him,” he said, but he looked beseechingly at Dan. “But he’s horrible, he only wanted sex and that’s what he got.”

  “How do you know they had sex?” asked Dan.

  “Nat told me.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes.”

  “Gary,” said Dan, leaning forward and putting her arms on her knees, as though they might talk with just the two of them able to hear. “You promised me you were going to tell the truth, all of it, and now I feel like you’re holding something back from me.”

  He licked his lips, looking Dan in the eye.

  “I saw them,” he said, then looked away. “I was in the club, where everyone else was too, and he was pestering her. She was quite drunk, drinking too much, and I’d told her to stop twice, but she wouldn’t. So he started sniffing round her again and I told him to back off and leave her alone. She was only eighteen a little while ago.”

  “And did he?”

  Black shook his head. “No, ma’am. There was a scuffle between me and him and some of his friends. I didn’t hit him, though, I promise, but the bouncers, they said it was my fault and I had to go, and also Nat was shouting at me, too, saying it was my fault, but I was only looking out for her.”

  “Then what happened?”

  “I had to go out of the club, but she was still in there, and I knew he’d wait for her, because she was drunk. I couldn’t just leave her there. I knew she’d been drinking. I’m her friend.”

  Dan nodded slightly as though she approved of all he was saying.

  “What did you do?” she asked.

  “I waited outside the club, down the street, for her, just so I could make sure she was okay when she came out, to make sure she got back to the ship okay.”

  “Did you follow her, Gary?”

  He shook his head.

  “No, ma’am, I didn’t. I saw her meet with him again and then…” He looked to Cox, who again nodded her permission. “And then I went for a drink with Chief Pollack.”

  “Gary, did you know that sometimes Nat didn’t like you helping her? That it made her feel frightened?”

  “I was just trying to help. Like, I changed her duties so she wouldn’t have to see Coker and his mates, and I’d let her stay back here with me so that they’d all be gone off the ship
and she could be away from them.”

  “How did she feel about that?”

  “We were friends, so she was okay with it, appreciated it. We became good friends. We had lunch together and stuff.”

  “Did you ever go to her house, Gary?”

  He seemed to shrink back at that question, tensing again.

  “Did you?” pressed Dan.

  “Only to check if she was okay,” he said. “I thought if she was frightened or worried, then she’d feel safe if I was there for her.”

  Dan felt John Granger readying himself on the chair next to her, but wasn’t sure why. She felt oddly calm, as though she knew Black wasn’t going to do anything rash, not yet.

  “Gary, did you go there before she went missing?”

  “Yes,” he said, his voice faint.

  “And did she know you were there, or did you go uninvited?”

  “She didn’t say I couldn’t go,” he finally replied. “So I went there and slept in my car for a few nights, just to make sure no one bothered her.”

  Dan inhaled deeply and watched him carefully.

  “Gary, do you have any idea where Nat is now?”

  “No, ma’am, I really don’t, honestly. I’m worried sick about her.”

  “Do you know anyone who might want to harm Nat? Someone who might want to hurt her?”

  He laughed at that, a broad smile.

  “No, ma’am, she was lovely, I can’t think that anyone would want to hurt her at all.”

  “Gary. I think SA Moore was afraid of you—”

  “No, she wasn’t,” he said quickly. “We talked about it.”

  “I think she was worried because she knew you’d been outside her house.”

  “No,” he interrupted again. “No, it wasn’t like that. We talked about it, she liked me, too.”

  John Granger was on the edge of his seat now. Dan could see him trying to look casual, but Black’s manner was becoming more agitated and erratic as he shook his head and explained himself more loudly.

  “Did you take pictures of Natasha without her knowing?”

  “Ma’am?” he said, and it took a moment for Dan to realize that Black wasn’t talking to her, he was talking to Cox.